The greatest gift has always been you – how being a mom is both fulfilling and terrifying and what I
I always knew I wanted to be a mom. From a very young age, I thought about it. Since having a child I’ve learned a lot more about myself and living life in the moment. I’ve learned about what it takes and what you need to let go of in order to be balanced and healthy as a parent. I’ve learned that the big moments matter and the small moments do too. I’ve learned that this is the most rewarding and important job but it’s also the hardest.
Being a parent is great because of the experience you have of seeing them grow, learn new things and discover the world. You get to see this baby that you love become bigger, stronger and able to do things they couldn’t do before. It’s interesting to see them asking themselves big questions about the world and begin to formulate their own answers, use problem-solving skills and begin to share with you their thoughts on why things may be a certain way. Being a mom is great for so many reasons – you are working hard to raise a thoughtful, kind human being who will hopefully become an adult who lives those values and who does great things. You see them dream big and you help them to feel capable and confident, brave and able to grow up and have the things they want out of life. And ofcourse being a mom is great cause of the late night cuddles and all the moments you look back and remember all the sweet moments there have been since they came into the world.
But being a mom is also terrifying. It’s terrifying because your influence is powerful and you want to set the right example. It’s the job that no one told you was going to be this hard. Or how much you would worry about them when you’re not there. You know that the role you play in their lives is vital and that it can shape their sense of self-worth, their self-esteem, their health habits and so much more.
So what can we do to stay balanced and be our best selves with our kids?
Being healthy and balanced as a parent starts with letting go of the mom guilt. I think mostly we are doing the best we can. And sometimes we may fall short of our expectations and we can come back to them and adjust but we have to make sure our expectations are realistic to begin with.
Being a good parent is about presence – being there for them, playing with them, setting up an environment to allow them space to play and discover, but also allowing room for yourself and a bit of space to recharge. Everyone needs a night off for themselves, an afternoon movie in once in a while to sit and relax with your kid in your pjs and an evening of skipping the homemade meal and going out for dinner instead.
Taking care of yourself also means staying active and eating well. I love involving my son in my workouts and we make it fun. He also likes actually making up a workout for me now. It’s part of teaching him something I value which is taking care of yourself and the body you’re in.
Most importantly, being balanced to me means listening to my intuition and checking in with myself regularly. It means noticing when something isn’t working or when I’m pushing myself harder than I should or falling back into the habit of thinking that being a good mom means that I have homemade muffins or banana bread available each time my son comes over. The truth is, being a good mom has always been about two things: love and presence. And they are things that are much easier to give to our kids when we are taking care of ourselves too.
What does being a healthy and balanced parent mean to you?
