Everyday Adventures: Kayaking

This past September, I had the opportunity to try kayaking on a sunny afternoon at a colleague’s cottage on a private lake. I was actually inspired by a client who last year had talked about kayaking and I figured it was time I try it. I probably would have been hesitant to jump on a boat and try it out if it wasn’t for some guidance from another coach who has done this many times. As I got the hang of paddling and learned the tricks of how to move from side to side with how I turned the paddle, I began to move forward quite quickly and found that I could steer myself towards where I wanted to go.

There is a rhythmic movement in paddling that felt quite peaceful – I knew what to expect when the paddle hit the water, I knew I’d hear the sound of the water moving back and became familiar and anticipated the sensation of pushing something back to move forward. I was surrounded by greenery, not another cottage in sight and went far enough that the wooden cottage became quite small in the distance. The first time out was about learning how to paddle but when I went out a second time, already quite comfortable with what to do, I went out alone and this time stopped in the middle of the lake, brought the paddle into the kayak and just stopped. As I closed my eyes, I could feel the movement of the boat swaying, unable to sit completely still with the water underneath it. This was a beautiful place to be.

It made me start to think about how we define ourselves as individuals and the lack in our society at times of our own self-awareness. In Ann Betz and Karen Kimsey-House’s new book “Integration: The Power of Being Co-Active in Work and Life”, the authors explain that there is a separation in today’s world, a separation both from others and from ourselves. As they explain, “It’s painful and distressing to ponder the meaning – or meaninglessness – we fear is inherent in our lives and thus most of us generally avoid it, staying separate from ourselves, never really knowing our own core” (Betz and Kimsey-House, 2016, p.6). We live in a society where everyone wants to fit in and we’re taught to get along and fit in, but we’re less in touch with ourselves these days lacking sometimes the tools for understanding and knowing what we truly prefer.

The question of who am I and how would I define myself, my interests, my values is one that I would have been stressed about a few years ago but now it’s something I ponder on a lot more and that I can answer. I define myself by my roles, my interests, my values and my beliefs. It’s certainly not an easy question and I admit that I work in a profession where that’s been cultivated, where I’ve had to reflect on it, where these questions come up in my work with clients as well. I recently connected with another mom and when I asked her about her interests, she found that question really hard. She explained that since she had her kids a few years ago, she didn’t know what her personal interests were anymore and that she really wasn’t sure what to do with herself when she had some time to herself.

I think knowing ourselves is a process of discovery that is always changing. It is a hard question to answer and one we can't answer without really exploring and pondering on the question of who we are and who do we want to be.

Here on the water, in this moment, I could already tell for sure that kayaking had become a new found interest of mine and that this would be something I’d want to explore more next year once the season starts again. I know because I’ve been craving to get back out in the water ever since.

What activities bring you joy, feel right and are a part of how you define yourself and your interests?